Remember, Remember...

Hello. Today, I am a NERVOUS WRECK. And it is all the fault of one Guido Fawkes. I am not even kidding.

Y'see, though it embarrasses me to admit it, sudden loud noises terrify me. A firework just went off somewhere in the vicinity of my house and I inhaled so sharply MY BREATH ACTUALLY MADE A NOISE. And I can still hear my heartbeat reverberating through my body. I am a wreck. And a wuss. I have a dog who is a complete nutcase. He gets scared of being left on his own so much that he turns into a shaking slobbering mess (he's a rescue dog, which is where his issues stem from - not from me being cruel or anything...) and he whimpers and runs away from cats. And yet, even this furry ball of patheticness is blandly carrying on like THINGS AREN'T EXPLODING BASICALLY ABOVE OUR HEADS.

I do not like Bonfire Night. 

I guess it does have the advantage of being one of the most well known historical events in the country - and correctly known, too! Most people know that a band of disenfranchised Catholics planned to blow up Protestant King James I and his Parliament (and then stick his daughter, the Princess Elizabeth on the throne, on the grounds that she was very close to her mother, Queen Anne, who was a Catholic, and therefore likely to have been sympathetic to their views. Even though they'd, y'know, just killed her dad...); Guy Fawkes was not the main plotter, he was just the foot soldier (literally, from the Spanish Army) hired to do the dirty work of blowing up the Houses of Parliament but they were all eventually caught out when one of the plotters sent an anonymous note to Lord Monteagle who warned the King's security and lead to the plot being foiled. They would have been monitoring the activity of the buildings surrounding the Houses of Parliament...and there really isn't a subtle way to ship in 36 barrels of gunpowder. The plot almost definitely wouldn't have gone through, regardless of the anonymous tip-off.

Most modern Historians believe that it is highly likely that James's private secretaries knew about the plot, but didn't wish to "point the finger" too early, in case they didn't manage to catch all the plotters. In the end, they killed everyone they knew was involved, either in conflict in the standoffs which happened around the country where the plotters were hiding out, or when they were hanged, drawn and quartered for treason. Lovely.

The tradition of celebrating Bonfire Night did actually start in 1605, the year of the attempted murder, as the plot itself was foiled on the night of the 4th/5th November. The following day, there was great rejoicing in the streets of London, and bonfires were lit in celebration. Soon, this annual celebration became more violent, with people burning effigies of the Pope on the bonfire, a practise which has mostly died out, with the exception of the town of Lewes in Sussex, which burns and effigy of Guy Fawkes and the Pope every year, and celebrates the martyring of 17 local Protestants who were killed during Mary I's reign. 

But with the exception of this town, Bonfire Night is an excuse for most people these days to go out into the cold and eat toffee apples (yay!) and watch fireworks. And write their names with sparklers, which is something even I like to do.

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I know of no reason
Why the Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.
Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, 'twas his intent
To blow up the King and Parli'ment.
Three-score barrels of powder below
To prove old England's overthrow;
By God's providence he was catch'd
With a dark lantern and burning match.
Hulloa boys, Hulloa boys, let the bells ring.
Hulloa boys, hulloa boys, God save the King!

PS: Happy Diwali!